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JIM WARREN

Living Week by Week

12/31/2020

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When one is 86 years old it's prudent to live week by week.  Or in fact day by day.  I have read stuff by much younger people with advice to us old. I  thought to write from my standpoint since I have not read much written material from 86 year olds about life management. Certainly in their 70's one could plan and implement longer term goals and objectives. The emphasis on the day or week on hand can command all of one's attention now, for me, and will forgo much thought about long term ideas. It may be that at 86 the present is the reality and the only relevant reality, since the past and the future are evanescent.
       The gratitude one has to be alive at that age and still be able to plan day by day, is a gift. The gift of a wife and family nearby, even if Covid 19 impairs the connection, can be solved with the internet at all times.  As I say, the gift of life, the capacity to plan day by day, and gratitude for the blessing of wife and family makes it all worth while.
        On our refrigerator a sign says Do Not Resuscitate. This alerts the ambulance paramedics to honor our wish to die a natural death if there are no signs of life, after a collapse at home. I often wondered if I should have the sign tattooed on my chest if I collapsed on the street to avoid the well meaning who might bring me back to a simple vegetative state with broken ribs.
         I spent 40 years in Orthopedic surgery looking after a geriatric hospitalized demographic of patients with life crisis events. It was a learning experience, but it never prepared me for 86. We can't carry over the unique character of others. And I realized somewhere along the line that I was cowardly. My wife, my brothers, my children and all those I love are younger than me and for me to go first, spares me the grief that I seek to avoid. Another character flaw unearthed and about to be earthed in due time.
        How my Christian faith flows  around this unearthly dialogue to myself I do not know. God forgive me because I am only human and a sinner. I tried to be a Saint and failed. I yam what I yam. Popeye the sailor man !
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